You’re ready (or not) to face the truth about what’s holding you back in life and motherhood. Maybe, you’re curious about what change can be made to achieve success. Let’s reflect on 5 (yet relatable) truths you may be guilty of that are holding you back from greater potential.
You have potential. Whether it’s in your personal life or motherhood, you’re destined for greatness-and you know it! There’s just something holding you back from truly achieving it. Does this sound like you? Keep reading. If you’re anything like me (and many other moms) you’ll likely agree that these things are hindering you from being a better version of yourself.
Here, we’ll look at 5 things (or “truths”) that you may be guilty of doing that are holding you back from greater potential. These “truths” are written with love and compassion and brought to you from a fellow anxious comrade in motherhood. Are they true for you?
Prepare Your Mind for Facing the Truth (and Reaching Your Greater Potential)
Before we look at the roadblocks that hinder our potential, we need to prepare our thinking. Let’s get in the right mindset before exploring what’s really holding us back. Then, we can acknowledge and accept the truths for what they are and begin to make changes toward a greater future.
- Get honest with yourself
- Self-Reflect on your thoughts
- Gain Control of your thoughts
- Prepare & Get Excited for Change
Be sure to read all about empowering your mind and transforming your thinking by clicking here.
In 3, 2, 1…
Unrealistic Expectations Are Holding You Back
Setting unrealistic expectations builds a foundation for anxiety and failure. We don’t need that negativity in our lives! We’re burdening ourselves with unobtainable things and situations. Ultimately, this will set us up for disappointment. It could be expectations in a relationship or work, or even social media’s impact on our thinking. We can get rid of these burdening thoughts with the proper mindset.
Let’s think of unrealistic expectations as a simple formula.
Unrealistic Expectations + Disappointment = Unfullfillment
Here’s an example. Do we expect our husbands always to understand what we want and read our minds? While we may want this, it’s unrealistic.
Those unrealistic expectations in the relationship will disappoint us every time our husband falls short. Eventually, there will be burnout in the relationship leading to unfulfillment.
Why would we do that to ourselves?
Unfulfillment + Repetitive Failure = Holding You Back
If we continue this pattern in different aspects of our lives, we will consistently be held back.
An unfulfilled you is not meeting your greatest potential.
But, knowing this isn’t enough. There has to be a will within you to make change. There has to be action to achieve possibility.
Let’s approach our hypothetical situation with a more realistic expectation. One we have control over.
We want our husbands to understand us. We can control our communication. Write the “honey-do list” on the board, communicate desires, and prioritize projects together.
Now, we have verbalized our needs, discussed deadlines, and actively worked toward a solution, together.
Here’s another scenario. Are you a mom who scrolls through social media? Well, I’m sure you’re familiar with the aesthetic of beautiful houses and wondering why you aren’t capable of the same.
Then, you scroll to see a mom making a bento box lunch with rolled cheese and ham with colorful character toothpicks (linked in their Amazon storefront, of course), complete with sliced cucumbers, vinegar-washed berries, and something else that you would never have time to make. Meanwhile, you’re feeding chicken nuggets to your toddler for the third time this week (I’m guilty!)
Suddenly, we’re beating ourselves up (maybe) that we aren’t providing this similar situation for our children. Newsflash, for a good majority of moms, the truth is that this is unrealistic.
Rather, be real with your thinking. You have shelter to provide a comfortable home. Maybe, each night you’ll do a chore for ten minutes to help feel more tidy. Then, maybe on Friday, you’ll aim to make a more well-balanced and delicious meal that’s not dinosaur-shaped nuggets. Also, check out these 5 realistic expectations that are SO doable.
Realistic Expectations + Progress = Fulfillment
It may seem like common knowledge that unrealistic expectations hinder people’s potential. But, so many of us are guilty of it.
Setting realistic expectations allows us to be in control of our growth and work towards progress (which is obtainable) instead of self-loathing in failure. Remember: be mindful, purposeful, and intentional with your thinking.
Am I setting myself up for success if I am setting this expectation? Am I in control of the result, or will it control my emotions if I don’t meet this expectation? You can overcome the cycle of setting unrealistic expectations. It takes practice.
Fear Impedes Your Success
Fear can stop us before we ever begin. It can be the biggest roadblock to the light at the end of the tunnel. The problem with fear is that it’s an emotion that doesn’t have a real grounding to it.
It’s an “imaginary” feeling that can weigh heavy if we let it. Imaginary because how do we know what to be afraid of before we ever encounter the situation? If we haven’t started the journey, we truly can’t know what to be afraid of before it has begun.
Sure, maybe you fear that you’ll fail, but what if you succeed? The failure is a figment of your imagination. Fear is stopping success. Fear is holding you back.
Have you ever heard “Your fear of looking stupid is holding you back?” Isn’t it though? How many times do we miss out because we don’t want to look stupid?
Obviously, it’s good to proceed with caution in our lives. We should always take precautions when meeting a stranger from the internet. It’s necessary to protect our children from crossing a busy street.
But, is this fear holding you back from greater potential? Are you single because…fear? Do you keep your children sheltered because of fear?
If fear is keeping you static in your life and preventing you from reaching a desire, it has to go. Fears can have us give up on something, on goals, before we even begin to start.
Be more fair to yourself. Surrender fear to your new-found greatness! The only thing holding you back is yourself.
Comparing yourself to others
The grass isn’t always greener. Comparing yourself to others is holding you back from being the person you want to be. We can become absorbed in believing that what we see on the surface of other people’s lives is what we want or would like to achieve.
Different lives, different outcomes.
For a quick and simplistic, perhaps relatable example, let’s look at a working mom vs. a stay-at-home mom. Both have pros and cons.
A working mom misses out on a lot of quality time with their children but is making money to help provide for and buy things for their children. They can escape the chaos of the home for the day and have some needed quiet time. However, they’re in and out of the house so quickly, often before their child is awake. They get home later in the evening and don’t get much playtime with kids before bedtime. Her questioning of this lifestyle puts a strain on her mental health.
On the flip side, a stay-at-home mom isn’t making money. She’s missing out financially to help fulfill experiences for their child, such as theme park tickets (because they’re expensive). Her feet are probably in need of a pedicure because financially she can’t afford to pamper herself. She needs adult interactions. The lack of quiet time and constant attention to her children’s needs is placing a strain on her mental health.
Social Media: A “Real” Roadblock
Or, too often we look at social media and the influencers or other people in general and think “That’s a mom goal” (such as having a perfect-looking baby’s nursery straight from Pinterest).
Other people might have this, but, these could be things for those people to help fill a void. Or, it could be their literal job (think commission for product links or views and sponsorships).
Remember, we don’t always see things behind closed doors.
Nourish what you have at home or in your own life and truly love what you have going for you.
Striving for Perfection is Hampering Your Progress
Are you guilty of this truth? Striving for perfection is a surefire way to ensure that you don’t get far. The irony, right?
See, when we constantly seek for things to be perfect, the irony is that it’s holding us back.
Want a perfect body? (Doesn’t exist by the way) Then, you may never rock that outfit that you want to wear.
Want to be a perfect mother who doesn’t make mistakes? (Also, doesn’t exist). You’ll feel disappointed when you fall short.
Think progress, not perfection.
Time (or Lack of it) is Holding You Back
If only there were more hours in the day. I know we have all had this thought before. The days seem to fly by. But, truthfully, there probably is enough time if we prioritize and organize the day appropriately.
Lack of time might be one of our bigger enemies. We constantly blame it for everything we haven’t accomplished.
Laundry didn’t get done? No time.
Didn’t start that hobby, yet? Where is the time?
Eek. There probably is enough time and you’re guilty of putting these things on the back burner because you haven’t prioritized it.
It’s you. You’re holding yourself back by misusing your time. I’m guilty, too (nap>laundry, always).
Again, it’s misusing our time.
Small changes in our routines can help lead to productivity. We can reach our potential by implementing doable changes.
Someone, somewhere, said these true words and it changed my mindset:
“Five minutes working on something is five minutes more towards completion than never having started.”
It could be chores (collect laundry in the evening and toss a load in when you wake up). Or, it could be goals (turn on a podcast and start taking action, while you drive somewhere).
There is time. Find it. If not, you will always find a way to blame time.
Truly, are you guilty of not making the time?
It is time (pun intended) to set forth into a world of possibility and productivity with a change of mindset.
This is your sign to make a change. No more holding yourself back. Your potential is within reach. I believe in you!